TUFF ENUFF~! Episode 2

PIW Massacre
Nov. 30, 2002

Suddenly, the InsaneTron came to life. The fans in attendance blew up in excitement, especially when numerous bricks and debris came falling down on the InsaneTron, forming the letters of "PIW", than "Presents"followed by a large variety of idiotic clips such as midgets doing hip tosses, another one taking a body slam, all with the beat of some Super Nintendo Theme Music. Suddenly two bricks fell on one another and formed the two words that had been making the fans laugh hysterically throughout the night

TUFF ENUFF~!

The second edition of "Tuff Enuff opened up in a training facilitya.k.a. the ring before the fans were let in the building. Sean Studd stood center ring with a mic, surrounded by a bunch of PIW wannabesa.k.a. a lot of midgets. Most of them were trying to sit cross-legged, which was entertaining in itself as their legs, well, didn't quite 'cross.' Cuz they couldn't reach. Anyhow, Studd began to speak.

"Now, a lot of you have some potential. By being in this ring right here, you've done more than a lot of people will have ever done in their lives. That's right, sharing the same ring as Sean Studd." He smiled as the midgets clapped. "Now. To teach all you little, er, small, er, short, er, tiny, er, mini, er." He paused and the fans laughed at Studd's flubs in front of the little people. He sighed and continued. "You TRAINEES, a few things about the business. We thought that all the bump-taking and all that silly stuff is really overrated. Because any idiot can learn how to fall. Here, watch this. Get up."

One of the midgets pushed himself up. Studd raised a boot, put it against the midget's forehead and shoved him backward. The midget fell down and began flailing around on the mat like a bug stuck upside down on its back.

"Told ya. Anyway. To teach you EVERYTHING you need to know about this business. We brought you a former PIW Hall ofum, something or other, please welcome, the "Awesome One" Steve Hayden!"

"All In the Family" hit the PA system and the InsaneTron lit up and began showing highlights from Hayden's PIW career. Two seconds later, the InsaneTron was blank, but at the entryway stood Steve Trey-den. With a scowl on his face, he stomped down to the ring with his thumb in his mouth. He stomped up every step like a child who didn't get his way and got into the ring. He looked down at all the future stars of PIW.

"Sup..you little pieces of CRAP" Trey-den started. "I'm not working with ANY OF YOU... Unless you job to me"

Trey-den smiled widely.

"NOW...the fWo sucks.....just wanted to let you all know that....and anyone who books shows are idiots....always remember....that YOUR character...is the MOST important character...and....stuff...Any questions?"

All the trainees scratched their head and kinda looked around nervously. Then one of them raised a hand.

"What the phuck do you want asshole?" Trey-den asked.

"Um...nothing."

"That's just what I thought.you damn right you don't want nothing....and I'm not gonna tell you nothing...and I'm not gonna make nothing...but I'm a sports entertainment legend....the Unemployed One....Jim Johnson is a prick...and you can tell him I told him so!"

"Yeah, but his wife is sweet," Studd smiled out.

"Now, let's do a basic walk-thru of how you set up a match....You, Mr. Hand-Raisy with the nice hard ass I'd love to spank....Get up."

The midget who earlier tried to ask a question stood up nervously.

"Now, pretend you're Sylo"

The midget reached into his pockets and pulled out a bag of steroids and some blue hair dye!

Studd cracked up. "BWAHAHAHAHA."

"NO....NO....NO..." Trey-den said, grabbing the roids and the hair dye. He tossed it out of the ring. "Just PRETEND you're Sylo. Now. You're 7-1, 500 pounds, you no-sell everything. You know what would give YOU more depth?"

"Umm" the kid responded.

"I kick your ass in TWO MINUTES. What do you say?.....Think about it You'd have a GREAT ANGLE...You'd have gotten punked out by Steve Trey-den.....the greatest of all-time. SUCKAAAAAAAAAA!"

"Umm...I'm telling Johnson!"

"D'oh! Foiled again!" Trey-den said, snapping his fingers. "Too many politics here in PIW. Steve Trey-den is NOT a politician.....you bitches.....you're all bitches and asses.....word...I'm out of here yo..PEACE!"

Studd clapped, followed by the rest of the group. "Steve Trey-den everyone. And we'll be right back with more, after this less entertaining stuff."

NEXT CHAPTER: TUFF ENUFF~! Episode 3 >>

©2002 John Leary