Sharc

Sarah The Jobber Slayer

Death

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Violence Party

Violence 40
June 15, 2009

Static interrupted the Violence broadcast ever so briefly, as the scene switched from the Arena of Champions to the Arena of Drunkenness. A group of heavily intoxicated men and women cheered, jumped, whistled, and made retarded faces as the camera quickly panned around. In the middle of the chaos, seated with a bottle of beer, was a certain Sports Entertainment Icon who was banned from the Arena of Champions earlier tonight. Yes, Trey Vincent.

"LOCeeeeeee! Is this a Violence party, or is this just a cheap excuse to get drunk?!"

"WOOOOO!" came the reply of everyone.

"Not sure what the means, but hello LoC fans! We're live at an undisclosed bar featuring nearly naked waitresses. Earlier, everyone was loving the Cock On a Pole match. Trey Vincent not too long ago was having a similar match with one of the lovely young things here, but I called it a Cock IN a HOLE match. Florida, where have you BEEN all my life?"

The crowd cheered. And drank. And somebody somewhere probably puked.

"Shawn Hart, I can see your hairy, stinky vagina from here! You want to ban the MAN from Violence? Well you may be able to take the Trey Vincent off Violence, but you can't take the lust for violence ORRRR sex out of Trey Vincent."

"Trey! Trey!" a drunken fan interrupted.

"Trey Vincent is doing a promo, asshole!"

"This dude is doing an AWESOME impression of you. It's like a re-enlargement."

"A re-in what?"

Curious, Vincent stood up and headed toward the back of the LoC crowd he brought to the bar. Two guys were "acting."

"Here's your money, Umaga!" one dude said.

"It's about damn time!" said the other.

"Now go take out that Japanese guy so Trey Vincent can main event~!" the first dude said.

"WHOAWHOAWHOA!" the REAL Trey Vincent interrupted. "Trey Vincent didn't pay Umaga to take out anybody!"

Both guys point at Trey and laugh. "It's sooo obvious, dude," dude one said.

"Security! Two guys just fondled a waitress!"

The two guys looked at each other and bolted. A few seconds later, two security guys gave chase.

"Now, where was Trey Vincent. Shawn Hart, just so we're clear. You have made an enemy. Trey Vincent despises you. And at some point soon, when the doctors clear me to sports entertain, he'll kick you so hard in your crotch that you'll be spitting out your own bloody tampon."

Just then, a waitress walked by. Vincent grabbed her around the waist, pulled her close, and rubbed her ass. "Are you enjoying the Violence viewing party, honey?"

"It's awesome. That pillow fight was great!"

"Oh yeah? How would you like to go one-on-one with the Sports Entertainment Icon in a naked pillow fight, tonight, in my very hotel room?"

"I get off at one."

"That won't be the only time you get off tonight. And why don't you tell everyone how much Shawn Hart sucks."

"You mean, other dudes here in the bathroom? Quite often."

"BWAHAHAHAHA! Oh, Shawn, you sick little bastard. Trey Vincent will have his revenge. Maybe not this month. Maybe not even in two months. Revenge, like beer, is a dish best served often and in a variety of flavors. Enjoy the rest of your night, jerk!"

Static.

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