Woodchuck Bill vs. Trey Vincent

Pressure Point 75
Sept. 15, 2003
Writer: John Leary

The Scouting March hit the speakers. And out came Woodchuck Bill, the scout who is straight outta Toronto. The 5-11, 175 pound man was heavily bandaged above the waist, which could be noticed by the absence of his usual scouting uniform. He headed down and got into the ring, saluting the fans.

His music was then replaced Trey Vincent's new theme music. "Are You Happy Now?" by Michelle Branch. He's smitten by the lovely lady, and doing all he can to prove his love, apparently. He stepped out in a Team RATINGS~! T-shirt, the one that featured both Reed Young and Trey Vincent mugging on the front of the shirt, and on the back featured a photo of big boobs and the phrase Grabbing Ratings.

Once inside the ring, Vincent raises his arms out wide, making a "t" with his body, and then raised his arms up into a "V." He ripped open his shirt and tossed it at Woodchuck Bill.

The bell sounded.

Vincent charged and backed Woodchuck Bill up into the corner.

CHOP~!

Missed!

Woodchuck Bill dropped down on his ass and rolled out under the bottom rope. He covered up his mighty sore chest from Knife Edge Hell Night.

Vincent slid under the bottom rope and punched Woodchuck Bill in the face and then grabbed him by the head and rammed the back of his head into the steel post brutally. Woodchuck Bill collapsed to the floor and grabbed at his skull.

He wasn't moving particularly much.

Vincent looked down at him and began mugging for the crowd, which responded with boos for Action's Franchise Player. With his buddy Reed Young in charge, life wasn't going to be too hard for Vincent. TV picked up Woodchuck Bill after a struggled and tossed him into the ring.

Made the cover.

With a foot.

One.

Two.

Thre-shoulder up.

The Sports Entertainment Icon could not believe it. He figured Woodchuck Bill would be glad to just let the misery end there. Oh well. Vincent picked up Bill and tossed him into the nearest corner. Punch. Punch. Punch. Punchpunchpunchpunchpunch. Body shots all connected, rocking the scout.

Vincent lifted Woodchuck up onto the top rope and then turned around and got up onto the second rope. He grabbed Woodchuck around the neck, ready to hit a second-rope Shocking Conclusion on Bill. He bounced up and jumped off the rope!

But Bill shoved him away from himself. Vincent stumbled, but came to a stop on his feet. He turned around and got kicked in the gut.

Piledriver by Woodchuck Bill.

Woodchuck Bill bounced off the ropes and dove at Vincent, hitting a cross body block. But he rolled off and didn't make the cover. Vincent pulled himself up using the ropes and Woodchuck charged in with a flying forearm, knocking Vincent down, again, momentarily.

So Woodchuck decided to do some climbing. He got himself up onto the top rope and waited. But suddenly, Vincent charged toward him and pulled his legs apart.

CROTCHED.

The crowd groaned upon Woodchuck's landing. Vincent climbed up onto the second rope, this time not turning around. He picked up Woodchuck around the waist and slowly slid Bill down his back and cradled his head!

The fans all stood up, not believing what they were about to see!

Vincent jumped backward!

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT!" the crowd roared upon deadly impact.

Coming Down from the middle rope.

It was all over muthafuckas.

One.

Two.

Except...it wasn't. Vincent got up shaking his head. And laughing. He told the referee that he forgot one very important thing.

Vincent dragged Woodchuck Bill to center ring and got behind his head and shoulder area. Slowly, Vincent pulled off one of his black wristbands and tossed it down on Woodchuck Bill's chest. And yes, he was out of it. That move could potentially paralyze a man. But Vincent didn't care. He was in this to make himself look good.

Mission accomplished with the Coming Down move.

But now, it was time for the Most Outrageous Move In Sports Entertainment Today.

Big.

Time.

Fist.

Drop.

A bounce off every side of the ring, followed by a fist drop brimming with pizzazz landed on Woodchuck Bill's chest.

Vincent hooked the leg with the cover.

One.

Two.

Three.

Bell goes ding.

Vincent stood up and got his arm raised by the referee.

Outcome: Trey Vincent via pinfall

NEXT CHAPTER: City Of, Act IV >>

©2003 John Leary