Whooobygod!

Instinct
Aug 31, 2003
Starring Trey Vincent & Reed Young
Writer: John Leary

Backstage in Action central, a.k.a. a hallway with an Action! logo banner hung up, a man stood there with a microphone. Trey Vincent.

"Thanks guys. I'm backstage and what a night it's been so far. Keith Scott Zimmerman is really smelly tonight and that team he's facing is demanding he take a shower. Big Keith Vader? Yikes. Anyway. Tonight, the event everyone is talking about is not about that silly Garvin, Heimdal match. They're all talking about the man, the myth, the legend, Reed Young returning to the ring! And, wow, there he is. Reed! Reed! May I have a word with you?"

"WhatEVER!"

"OK, how about a few more words?"

Young came into view. The idiot savant, minus the savant part, was in a flowing robe and held up four fingers to the camera.

"Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeannnnnnn, WHOOOOOOObygod! Trey! Four fingers! And they're not to diddle your daughters and moms and nieces and sisters! Tonight, WHOOOOOOOO, four men will dismantle that SHARC guy! Sylo! Back from the Assylum to let the anal bleeding stop for a few minutes! Our mystery man! Who is a mystery! But will KICK SHARC'S ASS! Whooooooooo! Trey Vincent!"

Young chopped Vincent's chest. And again. And again. And again. Each made a smacking noise, Vincent barely flinched from them.

"The most ratings grabber in the game today!"

"The what?" Vincent wondered.

"And Reed Young! Sharc must face us all! I am the most HARDCORE, very, owner on the PLANET! And by the time, or should I say, IF! You're still standing when it's MY turn, I'll KICK YOUR GAY FAGGY ASS ALL OVER DETROIT! Or where EVER we are! And when you get very hardcore with Reed Young, it's a question of not beating me! It's a question of ME letting YOU survive! And if, by some fluke, you are able to beat the talent stealing, wheeling dealing, fWo ass kicking, whoooo, son of a rich daddy, you can get your stupid merchandise back, your music, your lights. All that crap that hid the fact that you sucked a SUCKLOAD of SUCK!"

"Thanks for that one, Mr. Harker," Vincent said. Inside shoot, baby!

"Now suck on that. Break it down. And whether you love me or hate me, learn to tremble near me! These bones were made for breaking, and that's just what I'll do. And one of these days I'm gonna break those bones of YOU! Mwhahahaha. Just as the mighty Hercules captured the elusive white shark, so will I! Tonight. Whoooooobygod! Whoooooobyygod! Whooooobygod!" He walks off, repeating this phrase until he's out of ear shot.

"You might want to have that looked at. The whoobygod cough is nothing to ignore. Anyway. And no, I'm not at all worried about Sharc, just for the record. I've beat him twice in his kind of matches. Bats and chairs, cage match. He can't touch this. He's been a loser all his life. Tonight, is just another chapter is the worst story ever told. He's nothing but a hardcore failure. Scrub, prepare to be on jobber status for the rest of your stay in Action. It will only seem like an eternity. Guys, let's send it back to you."

NEXT CHAPTER: Sharc vs. Sylo, ????, Trey Vincent & Reed Young (No Disqualification Gauntlet Match) >>